Sooooooo angry at myself!!!

Just what in the world is wrong with me??? “If God be for me, WHO can be against me?”

I gotta stop letting the enemy reap havoc in my life, and I go curl up under bushes, with my tail tucked… Whimpering and subdued… I’m a child of God, an heir of God and a joint heir with Christ Jesus!!!

God has placed tooooooo much in me for me to keep shutting down on His work!!!

My deepest apologies to everyone who has been willing to back me on His endeavor. But, watched me inadvertently sink into that ridiculous nearly two week depression phase… I’m just grateful that God knows me through and through; enough to know that I wasn’t arbitrarily saying no I won’t do it, because other secular issues and/or opportunities took premise.

But rather He saw the distractions the adversary created for me, to veer me off course, and He had to send the right people along to pull me back. I’d like to thank each one of you for continuing to message me, in spite of my silence, during my trying time… That is nobody but God, to keep you steadfast, amidst my craziness… Thanks, thanx… Then thanx one more again!!!

Everybody… Alone No More is about to take off… Hurting individuals will have the love, compassion, attention, affection, care, concern, time, and anything else they need!!! God purposely saved me from twelve obnoxious suicide attempts, and I suffer from Nooooooo brain damage at all… Actually, I’m ridiculously intelligent… Which shows He’s ever so present in my life. Therefore, onward I go… In His service!!!


BnfEnT (CEO Son Son – DMV)


16 thoughts on “Sooooooo angry at myself!!!

  1. Glad to hear you are back πŸ™‚ It’s amazing sometimes, the journey God sends us on…just when we think we can’t take another second..but He is there. He’s always there. There have been times when I have turned my back on God but yet in my heart a part of Him always lingers never allowing me to fully go to the darker places in life. So refreshing to hear you speak of God the way you do. I truly believe in the power of prayer so I will certainly keep you in mine πŸ™‚

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Hey hun, thanks for the follow! I just want to say, from one master of depression to another, that when it strikes, keep telling yourself that it ALWAYS passes. It goes away. So, no matter how dark the days are, you will recover and smile again, and you are always beautiful, through the bad days and the good, and your heart doesn’t change, it remains it’s wonderful self. So don’t be afraid of the depression, it’s not strong enough to conquer you! sending you tons of hugs and courage x x x

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thanx hun… I receive the encouragement and send it right back your way, for you to utilize when the going gets tough and/or rough in your neck of the woods… It’s wonderful how supportive everyone here is… May Heaven smile upon you and yours in Jesus name


  3. The world can be an awful place, leading to one’s instability. However, God is on your side, giving you a specific mission within your toolbox of knowledge and expertise to help those in dire need. Whatever pitfall you face, you shall rise again to continue the Lord’s work even stronger and smarter than before. Keep the faith and hope alive. You shall succeed, there is no doubt.

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Wish that I could have helped you. I’ve been traveling down a particularly difficult road myself lately, seeing detractors at every turn. Some days I fell like Job…. It’s said that He never gives us more than we can handle. But some days it seems like we need help handling some things…. I’m glad you are in a good place

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thanx… Just remember Job’s outcome… Eventually, he came out better off then before his fall… God Blessed him with double. God can and will do the same for us as well.


  5. Depression is a mean, ugly taskmaster I have spent many a season getting whipped by, but, greater indeed is He who is in us!!! Time to do some whipping of our own! Praying always, friend! Hugs! πŸ™‚

    Liked by 2 people

  6. Hey, sister, don’t be so hard on yourself. Even the great prophets in the Bible suffered depression, it is not a sin. It is a very real attack. We know that lying deceiver comes to steal, kill, and destroy. If he can’t take your life, then he will try to take your vision, and your identity. But, remember, you are firmly rooted in Him and yes, my friend, you are more than a conqueror, God is for you! He is not angry with you.

    I tend to be hard on myself too. I battle with the thoughts of how can I believe for everyone else and not me? But, don’t ya know, the devil attacks our minds. So, keep writing my sister, let your light shine and it’s ok when you are feeling low.

    As David, who dealt with depression too, said “Why are you so downcast my soul? Trust in the Lord!”

    Go get ’em!

    Liked by 3 people

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