Da Ugly Ducklin – The Transparent Me 8/25/15 (DAY 37)

Today is TALK ABOUT IT TUESDAY

Hair is a mess… gggggrrrrrrrrrhhhhhhhhh! All the back to school babies beat me to the punch with my hair stylist

Still tremendously sleepy… This is ridiculous how fast training came about geesh!!!

Day three of lessons reminding us to make the best use of our time… No Godless chatter, backbiting or gossip

Read God’s Word, Pray, Praise & Worship… We need God like we do food for the nourishments of our body

Make sure your line of importance runs like this God first, others second then focus on yourself thereafter

During transition, your mate has to understand that you’re not shunning them but tired instead, and trying to adjust

My dream is to be in FULL-TIME Ministry for God, then life will definitely be less stressful

Be careful not to act as the world does just because they’re family… “Be NOT conformed to this world…”

Use your talents for God and watch Him increase you like never before

Another poor presentation (Vlog) toooooooo sleepy, and not at my best SMH! Please forgive me

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Da Ugly Ducklin – The Transparent Me 8/24/15 (DAY 36)

Today is MAKE EM SMILE MONDAY

Even if you’re use to the atmosphere at your current job, realize change comes with elevation and transformation

How can God take you higher if you keep fear as your confidant or companion?… Trust and Obey!!!

Please forgive me… Terrible Vlog… Sleepy to the fifth power!!!

Miserably sleep deprived… Jesus HAS the wheel!!!

Can’t wait to get situated!!! So outta my element, and so many arenas of my life is being negatively impacted SMH

My Rick Warren emails always comes at 4:44 am, this means my Angels are with me… Thank You Daddy 🙂

Make the best use of your time, remembering that an idle mind is the devil’s playground… Keep him far far away!!!

Watching myself fall asleep while driving… Totally DANGEROUS 😦 😦 😦

When you do wrong,quickly repent,turn from your wicked ways and hop back on the battlefield for Christ

Compliment and/or encourage anyone today, especially those who are normally insecure

Stream televangelists to your TV, so that you can spend quality time with God

Rest is important both spiritually and naturally… Pray for me to start back resting well again. Insomnia’s back

Da Ugly Ducklin – The Transparent Me 8/23/15 (DAY 35)

Today is SUPPORT SOMEONE SUNDAY

Make a special trip to a hospital, hospice, mental institution, nursing home, jail or prison to sit with somebody today

Sit down, call up a long lost friend or estranged family member or love one… Inspire, compliment & encourage them

Lend a helping hand today. Allow God to surprise you through you (Buy someone’s groceries or pay a bill off for them)

Pray and ask God to lead you to that perfect someone who could use the support most that He wants you to give

Show God you trust Him by not fighting against the transitions He has you embarking upon… They’ll pan out beneficial

Do not allow the enemy leeway into your life, mind or heart, to have his way, and reap havoc… Resist & he’ll flee

My reasoning for me being so mushy when people show me love for the things I’m doing for God… “The Passion’s of Christ”

Looking for love in all the wrong places caused me to be promiscuous SMH… But, God shielded me from death & disease.

Da Ugly Ducklin – The Transparent Me 8/22/15 (DAY 34)

Today is SEEK HIS FACE SATURDAY

Spent quality time with God and I’m so ELATED

The messages from both Joel Osteen and Rick Warren Blessed  my Spirit immensely!!!

To think of how God can simply speak, and the world is formed, shows just how good He can do in our lives

Thank you all, there’s POWER in Prayer…And even more influence when we go to the Throne in numbers 🙂

I got the job, and even received Favor over some who had a higher seniority!!! Won’t God do it

Be careful what advice you take, even if it’s from a well trusted friend, they mean no harm, but satan does

I must apologize to God for appearing ungrateful, and running from person to person for advice… FEAR

When you ask God for a Blessing and get it, don’t let doubt creep in

God makes nooooooo mistakes, and only wants the BEST for us

Don’t do tricky things to get yourself out of a place God is transitioning you to; especially after you asked for it

God knows how to turn anything the enemy tries to use to harm you into a HUGE Blessing… Trust and Obey!!!

Even when your shift seems like you’re getting the short end of the stick, don’t worry… God Gotcha 🙂 🙂 🙂

Da Ugly Ducklin – The Transparent Me 8/21/15 (DAY 33)

Today is FREE YOUR MIND FRIDAY

When you feel as though you’re being PUNKED, instead see the situations as TESTS that you must pass

Don’t be so overbearing and mean towards others… Consider their feelings and needs FIRST

That brief pause was imperative… my trunk was open, and I seen an accident waiting to happen SMH

The enemy can’t send small irritants your way when you’re grounded & rooted in Christ… he really sticks it to you

Allow God to kill your flesh daily, so that you don’t haphazardly offend nobody… Rudeness is a No No!!!

Recognize your Spiritual tests and pass them…So, you’ll become a Victor in that area, and thus a better person as well

It’s very important to stay before the face of God, lest you give the enemy time to hop in and try you

Allow God to decrease you and have the Holy Spirit increase in you. So that you say and do only what’s Godly

It’s always a Blessing to wake up to no texts or missed calls from family… Reassurance that ALL is well 🙂

Be careful of the things you watch on TV, negative energy transfers, and the news can sometimes be bad for us too

Use your time wisely! Even after work and completing household chores… Still don’t make room for Godless chatter

Da Ugly Ducklin – The Transparent Me 8/20/15 (DAY 32)

 

Today is THANK HIM THURSDAY

Lol, I honestly thought I was being PUNKED I ended up babysitting ten children… unknowingly SMH

You talking about a headache from outer space, I had it like never before ggggeeeeeeeeeessssssssssssshhhhhhh

They had the back to school jitters or something… And taming them with candy was a HUGE mistake!!!

I almost spanked their rumpelstiltskins numerous times… But, some of my children are against it… Keep em home!!!

Even though I was frustrated to the nineteenth power, I was lenient, because the adults were handling business

Next time Imma get me a good old-fashioned switch off the nearest tree, “sting em britches” as Granny use to say

Nonetheless, there was a lesson in all of it… God wants me to help out in that arena

I’m good at any other task, Grandma wise. But, babysitting wasn’t my thing at all, and I’m a stickler to that fact

At least I was “a stickler”… God requires and demands more from and of me… We are to help when needed!!!

To add, I gotta stop making mountains out of mole hills, and figure tactful ways to keep them busy and in order

Granny successfully raised her 16, and umpteen of her grands… I’m just as able; with God on my side 🙂 🙂 🙂

Da Ugly Ducklin – The Transparent Me 8/19/15 (DAY 31)

 

Today is WE CAN DO IT WENESDAY

Happy and cheesing from ear-to-ear… Back to back days off!!! Ohhhhhhhhh yoppington 🙂 🙂 🙂

“We can do ALL things through Christ who strengthens us!”

God is AWESOME, and showed up and showed out in my life today… Sooooo overjoyed; Thank You Daddy!

Can you say CHANGING FOR THE BETTER x’s two (2)… Go God, Go Me, Go God, Go Me!!!

Washed clothes, three loads… All by lonesome… Good job girly

Cooked and laid out dinner for later

On my way household and necessities shopping… woooo hoooo 🙂

Spent quality, quality, quality time with my Heavenly Father… Filled up to the brim

EVERY adult is outta the house doing something productive… Won’t God do it!!!

Wait on God, don’t dare get suicidal… Believe against all odds that He’s for sure a keeper of those who love Him

Never give up HOPE… Keep the FAITH in the face of adversity

The tables turned… My husband try to reap havoc… But, God just simply ain’t having it, and I never fed in to it

Da Ugly Ducklin – The Transparent Me 8/18/15 (DAY 30) continued…

Today is TALK ABOUT IT TUESDAY continued…

Don’t beat yourself up & and question your Salvation, when you repetitively do wrong… Instead Pray harder for CHANGE

If you see the evidence of God in your life (Blessings, Grace & Mercy), worry NO MORE… You’re a part of the family

How do you TAME the tongue??? Tired of lashing out and hurting others… Being human, in my opinion, is NO excuse!!!

Reassured that God still loves me in spite of my loose lips… But, it ANGERS me afterwards, and rightfully so SMH 

“Loose lips sink ships!!!” be mindful of how you address others… They do have feelings you know; or do you???

Even if your mind convinces you otherwise about your mate… Hold your Peace, if you’ve wholeheartedly given it to God

Never avoid altercations to the point where it causes health issues (READ THIS CAREFULLY – TRICKY, BUT TRUE)

Make sure to ALWAYS say “If it’ll be the Lord’s Will I’ll do this, this or that” Our plans still need His APPROVAL

If you and your mate are displaced (Living with others), be good to each other THROUGH it… No misplaced anger

Working God’s adrenaline and strength… Totally sleep DEPRIVED… Sad, sad, sad gggeeeeeeeeeeessssssshhhhhhhhh!!!

What’s the real scoop on the Sandy Hook Elementary School shooting… Enquiring minds wants to know!!!

Just because you’re agitated, due to things you brought on yourself… That don’t mean take it out on your mate

Da Ugly Ducklin – The Transparent Me 8/18/15 (DAY 30)

Today is TALK ABOUT IT TUESDAY

Hubby came home… I Prayed and God answered. Now, I gotta step outta the way!!!

Very IMPORTANT… it’s in no way ok to discuss your relationship with your children… They haven’t a clue what you’re to do

By nature, your babies want to protect. But, they can give you wrong advice, as a safety mechanism; on your behalf

God’s JEALOUS, and He don’t like it when we Pray for His help, then snatch our situations back, to handle ourselves

Regardless of the predicament, your mate should be contacting you daily… Silence makes room for assumptions

Pray SPECIFIC… God knows all. But, wants to hear it from you. He’ll give us the desires of our hearts

Know that you know that you for sure know your Heavenly Father’s voice; as to not give the enemy a foothold in your life

You DON’T have to have an altered mind in order to interact with others (Drugs & Alcohol) only makes it worse

The Holy Spirit can’t and won’t dwell in an unclean Temple… Remain SOBER guys!!!

Allow yourself to decrease, and God rise up when you have to socialize or have important conversations

Once promiscuous, but DELIVERED… unscathed, no deadly diseases… Thank You Daddy 🙂 🙂 🙂

“Judge not lest ye be JUDGED!!!”

Da Ugly Ducklin – The Transparent Me 8/17/15 (DAY 29)

Today is MAKE EM SMILE MONDAY

Know that God is delighted to handle ALL our affairs if we would just TRUST in Him and ask for His help

Before you know it, things will begin to be Peaceful, clear and running smooth all around you… Give Him the Praise

Cast your cares! What? How do I do that? Simple, just raise your arms to God, and say Daddy I’m clueless and I need You

Crazy near death experience in the middle of the night SMH… What in the world was that all about???

My husband and I had a WEIRD interaction… Too sleepy to ponder though. Jesus grab the wheel 🙂 🙂 🙂

Feelings hurt in ER, because I must look like an OLD lady… Asked if I was my husband’s mom ggggggrrrrrrrrhhhhhhhhh

I see myself as Shallow Hal seen most of his potentials… Preserved, young and beautiful lol… funny right???

Wondering, in my lil inquisitive mind, if my husband is still dealing with an ex for financial gain

Finally destroyed the SCAM check… Had forgotten about it all this time. Thank God it was still there

Stop sabotaging your relationship by always thinking the worse about your mate… God makes NO mistakes

Da Ugly Ducklin – The Transparent Me 8/16/15 (DAY 28)

Today is SUPPORT SOMEONE SUNDAY

Practically NOOOOOOO sleep… Not at all the Will of God. Glad to be rid of my problem… Still Praying for him though

Proud of myself, hospital calls about my husband, and I Trust God and stay at work and finish my shift… GROWING

If your love one resists your help… Let go and let God. Continue to hold them up before God

Mad at myself for some of the harsh things I said to my husband… Anger is no excuse nor justification… MUST REPENT

Don’t get outta character because others are nonchalant and/or rude… Contact a supervisor instead

Even in knowing what harsh effect K2 is having on people, my husband insists on indulging… I’m DONE

If a person don’t take physician advice then surely your opinions won’t be warranted… Give it to God

K2 (Synthetic Drugs) is killing people guys… NEVER touch it, and encourage your love ones to do the same

When enough is enough… Fall back, especially when the person you’re trynna help won’t even help themselves

Instead of remaining sober my husband transitioned to something worse… Stand in Prayer with me please

Da Ugly Ducklin – The Transparent Me 8/15/15 (DAY 27)

Today is SEEK HIS FACE SATURDAY

After a breakup, Pray for Peaceful rest… I did, and I slept rather good ALONE

Seek God about ALL your situations (Financial, relational, emotional, situational, and definitely Spiritual)

God has plans and a specific purpose for each of us… Certainly seek His face for guidance and direction

Fam, don’t be too friendly with neighborhood individuals of the opposite sex, it only leads to unnecessary problems

It’s ALWAYS best to hear your mate out, opposed to running with the story you hear about them from another

Get to a MATURE place in God where you don’t overreact and lose your job behind relationship issues… TAKE TEN

Questioning another about whether they’re SECRETLY sleeping with your mate is pointless… They’ll never tell!!!

Pray immediately when something’s bothering you, don’t inadvertently suffer from medical issues due to unresolved issues

Meeting with children still not held SMH… Avoidance hhhhmmmmm???

Never stir up confusion with others in an attempt to get the heat off of you… Childish move on your part

Remember: God will make sure that those He don’t want in your life can’t stay, and those He does can’t leave

Da Ugly Ducklin – The Transparent Me 8/14/15 (DAY 26)

Today is FREE YOUR MIND FRIDAY

When you give yourself to Christ fully, He’ll show you things that’s occurring with your family that needs your attention

Can’t figure out for the life of me why my life is becoming a COMPLETE rollercoaster

The TRANSPARENT me is meant for my life to be shared, so that others can be helped through my experiences & problems

My baby daughter and my middle daughter are going through something that needs Mommy intervention

When your family is going through something, don’t kick them while they’re down. Instead, help out

Family makes stupid mistakes, but don’t overly punish them, when you have the capabilities to assist

Don’t allow your Union, who you pay weekly/biweekly to lie to you, and cause you to resign (You have rights)

NEVER send your family to a freekin shelter when you have adequate space available for them to live

Of course if your family is able to pay accept it. If not, definitely don’t turn your back on them… That’s not love!!!

Money is not more important than helping your love ones. God will Bless you accordingly

In need of Prayer for me and my family… Things are dwindling downward for each of us on a daily basis SMH

Da Ugly Ducklin – The Transparent Me 8/13/15 (DAY 25)

Today is THANK HIM THURSDAY

God is AWESOME… I’m in a GOOD mood

We all woke up, we have activity in our limbs, our five senses are operable, we’re healthy & whole [To name a few]

Y’all, I did it again SMH… Spontaneously left work gggrrrrrrrhhhhhhhhh!!!

Hubby’s home yyyyaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaayyyyyyyyyyyy 🙂 🙂 🙂

Family meeting scheduled… Jesus, take the wheel please

Forgive me guys… I acted a real donkey… Got a lot of maturing to do (SPIRITUALLY)

Cigarettes missing, nobody cares… Now I’m in a stupor and shut completely down

Don’t you dare waste away a whole day moping, murmuring and complaining… God ain’t bout dat life!!!

How you look being so in your feelings, to the point where you can’t be a grandmother? Grow up already!!!

Sad situation that further shows I need maturity… Not happy about my husband’s potential success, in fear of him leaving me

NEVER sabotage your mate’s things out of (FEAR – False Evidences Appearing Real)

Pray for my liwwle (in my granddaughter’s voice) grandbaby, her not feeling well; two trips to ER

Stop Praying for more when you know you haven’t been a good steward over the things you’ve been given

*** Juanita Bynum “No More Sheets” a must see

Sistahs… Remain the same chick he fell in love with (Hair done, nails did, outfits on #fleek, house clean, and feed him)

Ladies… Keep yourself up! Don’t just let your weight get outta control, even baby fat can come off… Do it!!!

God has BIG things in store for us… It’s NOT His desire that any of us live in lack (poverty, depression, misery, etc.)

Da Ugly Ducklin – The Transparent Me 8/12/15 (DAY 24)

Today is WE CAN DO IT WEDNESDAY

I’m now a firm believer that the things you do to your parents will eventually return to haunt you

Things were crazy all night and morning… But, still I TRUST God

Hard for a caring grandmother to turn a blind eye and deaf ear to things going wrong with the babies in her life

Started to place myself back in a homeless state due to frustration with my daughter… Thank God I didn’t overreact!!!

Single again because of the mess pertaining to my granddaughter

Just what do you do when your grown child won’t listen to you, but they’re making wrong decisions?

I have no clue as to why things went left between my husband and me. But, God have Your way!

Seeing one again, the things I did to my mother coming back around on me through my children

Children, regardless of age MUST know “Don’t do what I’m doing or have done”… Rather do what I say

Called a family meeting, and I desire for God to be in total control…. Just want them to know I’m only trynna help

Tragedies are increasing I DC… Prayers please

Hold your peace, and Pray first… Never jump the gun and create a huger problem for yourself or others

Whatever happened to “Mom knows BEST???”

C

Da Ugly Ducklin – The Transparent Me 8/11/15 (DAY 23)

Today is TALK ABOUT IT TUESDAY

Humbly realizing that it’s better to cook at home and stretch my meals, opposed to trynna keep up with the Joneses

Tragedy in the family… Cousin killed at Metro bus stop. Stabbed to death, on his way to visit with his children SMH

Is K2 causing these murders because people are haphazardly losing their minds?

Prayer needed for DC in whole… Car accidents are claiming our youth, coupled with shootings, stabbings and other violence

Pray for Sandra Bland’s family and also that JUSTICE will be served if she was outlandishly murdered

Still following the case where the police shot a young lady who was armed with a knife or multiple knives

God is definitely doing a thing with me, in changing my selfish & mean ways, and I’m openly allowing it ALL

We can’t get mad and decide to write people off because they want what you’ve owed them for months… DEAD WRONG

Mothers, we can’t arbitrarily cut all ties with our children because they anger us… God ain’t having it!!!

The apple don’t fall far from the tree, when you see the bad part of you in your child… Pray against generational curses

Open yourself up fully to God, and allow Him to have His way with you… CHANGE is imperative and beneficial

Da Ugly Ducklin – The Transparent Me 8/10/15 (DAY 22)

Today is MAKE EM SMILE MONDAY

Really good morning, got everything done, and still had time to spare… Ain’t God GOOD

Don’t let the enemy reap havoc between you and family… God don’t Bless mess!!!

See the devil for who he is amidst altercations… “We wrestle not with flesh and blood…”

Wondering if it’s validity in the Prophet’s claim that witchcraft is either being practiced in the home I’m in or has it been cast over it?

My smiles are due to my hubby taking the initiative to start writing his books again… Hallelujah!!!

When you get angry, please don’t overreact and destroy things that are dear and important to your mate

God is AWESOME, He helped me figure out how to fix a big project for my husband… made us both so happy

Let go of previous hurts, so that fear don’t cause sabotage

See the morals and potentials in your mate, and stick by them… it’ll pan out rewarding before long

Book writing program (Writenow 4)

Did K2 cause a lady to be shot by police in Washington, DC? This horrible drug has to cease and disappear!!!

We are to love in spite of the wrongs people do to us

Allow God to totally wash you clean of any wicked ways He finds in you

Got a Federal Government bid in for two WONDERFUL days off… Pray with me that I get it

Da Ugly Ducklin – The Transparent Me 8/9/15 (DAY 21)

Today is SUPPORT SOMEONE SUNDAY

Hubby been lovey dovey lately… That’s all well and fine, except for the fact that it cut into my planned study time SMH

Cured my seafood cravings… Huge payout though! Next time I’ll be cookin at home for sure.

Continue to Pray, even if God seems to be far away or simply not hearing you

“Seek and you shall find, Knock and the door shall be open unto you, and Ask and you shall receive”

I thank each of you for the wonderful comments, compliments, Prayers and marvelous words of encouragement

Remember: If you’re going through anything, find someone who’s experiencing your same pain, and Pray them through

God is wonderful… He delivered my husband totally from K2, and many others as well… Hallelujah!!!

Wait on God… Don’t rush Him. He knows what’s best for us, and will com through in His time

Don’t be mean and vindictive towards anyone, make less family who’s helping you… God don’t like ugly

Let God make amends between you and the very person who hurt you the worst

Da Ugly Ducklin came to be because of my dysfunctional family, and the lack of communication between us

Da Ugly Ducklin – The Transparent Me 8/8/15 (DAY 20)

 

Today is SEEK HIS FACE SATURDAY

Don’t beat yourself up when you feel like you’ve falling away from God, you’re actually still as close as before; if not closer

Love God with EVERYTHING in you, it’s sooooooooo rewarding

The Passion’s of Christ (Mel Gibson) wonderful movie… A must see

How God always brings us out, even from the things we bring on ourselves

TMOB (The Mouth of Babes) a Ministry I want to implement, to bring my grand babies closer to God

No matter your circumstances, you’re still expected to seek God regularly

Know that God still loves you even when you feel that you’re falling by the wayside

Get out the way, and allow God to change your wayward family member or love one

You don’t like traffic… leave early!!!

Da Ugly Ducklin – The Transparent Me 8/7/15 (DAY 19)

Today is FREE YOUR MIND FRIDAY

Woke up to car GONE… You talkin bout FURIOUS!!!

I lost the car“… Are you serious???

How your mates choice to indulge in illicit drugs creates unnecessary problems for the both of you.

Telling your grown children to live one way, but you settle for the things you’re trynna save them from… DOUBLE STANDARD

If you choose to put up with your mate… Don’t bagger them thereafter

Living with others is hard… Food issues arise, and everyone not buying household supplies… NOT FAIR

How my family is all of a sudden going through simultaneously SMH

My son’s up and coming rap career… My feelings about the uneasy content

How I want my children to get and keep my grandbabies before the face of God

How bad I want God to fall upon me on a daily basis… to help me serve Him correctly

We’re living in our last days… The signs are here… Get and/or keep yourself right in the eyes of God

My desires to be in full-time Ministry for the sake of my entire clan

Give God back His Word, He’s good to act on it, because He cannot and will not lie

Live a life of example in front of the youth around you, so that they’ll grow up successful

My husband trynna compare his wrongdoings with K2 to my old alcohol issues… Not the same!!!

Da Ugly Ducklin – The Transparent Me 8/6/15 (DAY 18)

WE CAN DO IT WEDNESDAY continued…

Worked ONLY 2 1/2 – 3 hours SMH

Don’t EEEEVVVEEEERRRR fake sick… It’ll definitely come back to bite ya in the rumpelstiltskin

Enraged at how my (thought to be) good deed was so insignificant… gggggggggrrrrrrrrrrrrrrhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!

Be careful dealing with banks, colleges, and I’ll go as far as to say that FAFSA is suspect.

Why am I still holding a FRAUDULENT check, nobody thought it to be serious enough to send anyone out… just horrible.

Day went left real quick… My manager went from 0 to 100 lol!!!

Get covered by the Union guys… They’re your safety net

Learn the rules about your rights to take off and leave work early multiple times in a specific time frame.

Da Ugly Ducklin – The Transparent Me 8/4/15 (DAY 16)

Today is TALK ABOUT IT TUESDAY

Master RESET again??? What the heck is going on with my phone… Hackers or nah?

Hair FINALLY on #fleek

Hubby back home SMH… I never got a chance to put him out and thank God I didn’t, because he’s WORKING yyyyyyyyyyyyaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy!!!

  • More money
  • Move quicker
  • No K2 smoked… Thank You Daddy.

Feeling awfully strange in my spirit… Sum just ain’t right. Can’t pinpoint it yet, but I’m feeling sum type of way 😦 😦 😦

Trust God to run your marriage… Breadwinners are NOT in control.

Prayers pay off, again I reiterate that!

Never fight against mandatory change

Do what God says no matter the cost

Personal ad (Possible Disaster)

Testimony may lead to Tricky Tracking #

Da Ugly Ducklin – The Transparent Me 8/3/15 (DAY 15)

Today is MAKE EM SMILE MONDAY

Contradictory Vlog: Yesterday I stated we must love in spite of. Then, I turn right around and ditch my husband to sleep on the streets.

Ironically, I have every reason not to smile.

My daughter nearly died behind illicit drugs.

Misplaced anger towards my mother-in-law SMH.

The BREADWINNER can’t even get a decent meal???!!!

The effects of K2 on your marriage, family and life.

Get rid of your flesh, it destroys you and others you interact with.

Should you leave your spouse for indulging in drugs, simply because they’re irresponsibly still doing it, even after something bad has happened.

Da Ugly Ducklin – The Transparent Me 8/2/15 (DAY 14)

Today is SUPPORT SOMEONE SUNDAY

Important for older children, who indulge in bad things, to have a cell phone for emergencies.

We must allow God to transform us to where we’re loving supernaturally… Not in the natural (HUMAN)

Generational curses MUST be broke

How God gave me favor while receiving beautification services

Take care of skin, feet and hair… Imperative for self-preservation

Don’t let the devil reap havoc in your relationship!!! Let God show you what’s really going on

Don’t plan how to be nice, that’s fake… Instead, allow the Holy Spirit to move through you

We are not to only love those who we’re comfortable with, but we gotta Pray about loving EVERYONE in spite of

Da Ugly Ducklin – The Transparent Me 8/1/15 (DAY 13)

Today is SEEK HIS FACE SATURDAY

  • Let God control who you date, your marriage or already established relationship (NO FORNICATING)
  • Trust God to lead you down the right path as you plan and confirm your annual vacation.
    • You’re destined to get the BEST deals
    • Reassurance that any problems, should there be ANY will be minimal to NONE.
    • You’ll find new things to do to have fun, ATTRACTIONS and ACTIVITIES will come to you like never before
  • Career choices and continuum of education… He definitely knows, and I’ll guarantee you that your new sought out and obtained profession will be one that you’ll look forward to every day.Unlike many of us, who merely go for a paycheck. Your God geared job will be one sufficient enough to retire from and you won’t have to double up (Work 2 or more jobs simultaneously)  either, because the one income will be Heaven sent more than enough… You’ll be the lender and NEVER a borrower.

Got my eyes, feet and nails done up yaaaaaaaayyyyyyy, just waiting for my stylist to grocery shop, and my hair gon be on #fleek too!!! She always flicks her wrist 🙂 🙂 🙂

PLEASE subscribe to my YouTube channel and follow me on EVERY social network that we connect in… Thanking you in advance!!!

Da Ugly Ducklin – The Transparent Me 7/31/15 (DAY 12)

Today is FREE YOUR MIND FRIDAY

Did not get my hair done 😦 😦 😦 Whole day went left!!!

No nail salon visit ggggggrrrrrrrrrrrrrhhhhhhhhhhhhh… that’s ok, because I should be off tomorrow (fingers crossed)

Baby girl doin it up in the Dominican Republic… Finally enjoying her vacation away, after a few rough patches that God helped her through.

Still Noooooooooo sleep SMH, tonight gotta be the night no doubt!

Husband finally back after another brief break-up (Talkin to me rude and harsh) That’s a no no, and automatic deal breaker – ZERO tolerance for utter disrespect.

Da Ugly Ducklin – The Transparent Me 7/30/15 (DAY 11)

Today is THANK HIM THURSDAY

Shooting in my daughter’s house (Close call SMH)

Her trip to the Dominican Republic

The 8 hours beautification process (Oh how HAPPY I’ll be afterwards)

HCYMABH… Back up and active.

Alone No More… Lying dormant, which is a GOOD thing, because nobody’s suicidal.

H.U.T. My desires for an immediate family (Annual Reunion) on a Yacht, even though I’m terribly scared of water.

TMOB – The Mouth Of Babez (New Ministry) For youth 21 and under, to learn the importance of having a relationship with God and the POWER in Prayer. Taking our children to church ain’t at all the gist of it. They MUST know what’s expected of them and all the BENEFITS within. More important, we don’t want them embarrassed or fearful to Pray to or interact with God.

Da Ugly Ducklin – The Transparent Me 7/29/15 (DAY 10)

Today is WE CAN DO IT WEDNESDAY

A day where we hold to the fact that we can do all things through Christ Who strengthens us.

My 13 yrs. old grandson arrested for a gun in his book bag. Could have caused the officers to shoot him unnecessarily.

Me experiencing Insomnia due to my being manic… Driving to work with eyes barely open SMH.

“Many are called, but few are CHOSEN”!!! Me disrespecting a coworker, then feeling awful afterwards… Open repent.

We MUST change in order to please God.

The thorn in my flesh is there for a worthy purpose.

Da Ugly Ducklin – The Transparent Me 7/28/15 (DAY 9)

 

Today is TALK ABOUT IT TUESDAY initially intended for friends and family to discuss different sermons, scriptures or Godly topics that each came across on previous days, for the purposes of readying yourselves for Wednesday Bible Study, where you’ll Prayerfully be armed with plenty of questions.

However my day didn’t begin good, and I had to vent after a crying moment, because I was so upset with my children.

Please give your opinion about the situations I discussed.

Thank God I feel 100 % better now… God Bless each of you, and may Heaven continue to smile upon you and yours

Please subscribe to my YouTube channel, and follow me on every social network where we meet up, and I’ll surely do the same for you.

Da Ugly Ducklin – The Transparent Me 7/27/15 (DAY 8)

Unbelievable!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! This video is all messed up, but I uploaded it anyway, just to show how things can happen SMH. It was two parts. But, instantly one whole part… The beginning just got lost somewhere in cyber space lol. Nevertheless, the ending tells what my theory is on the shenanigans. BTW… Today is MAKE EM SMILE MONDAY!!! With all the craziness going on with me lately, I can’t do nothing else but smile!!! Enjoy guys, in spite of the beginning being M.I.A.

Whaddayaknow, here’s the lost video… I knew it’d surface SMH

Da Ugly Ducklin – The Transparent Me 7/24/15 (DAY 5)

Today is FREE YOUR MIND FRIDAY no matter what the enemy tries to throw your way DODGE it, and keep it movin. Show him he has NOOOOOOOOOOOO power or control,and will not keep you bogged down!

Chris Brown with the suicide rumors going around. I searched through several sites, only to find out the world is getting all worked up about what they’re considering to be a cryptic message on his instagram… and more can be read here http://sandrarose.com/2015/05/is-chris-brown-suicidal/ & http://sandrarose.com/2015/06/chris-brown-wont-be-around-next-year/

I Pray she’s wrong. But, I’m not too happy about the writings she wrote, and many others stated their feelings on her site.

My apologies for getting upset, after talking about the beating I received from my last husband, and not really doing well in the Vlog.

Family should always stick together and help one another out, especially during homelessness.

Parents Pray for your grown child or children who’s not doing right in the eyes of God.

Sometimes our wayward children are complete replicas of us… Hmmmmmmm!!! “Train up a child in the way they should go and when they’re old they won’t depart from it”

The affects illicit drugs had on me, and my transition into alcoholism, and subsequent deliverance from it all.

How to be the bigger person and apologize for your wrong actions when you’ve hurt someone.

How the good in your mate can help you. (My husband making me share and diminish my stingy ways).

The shooting in my daughter’s home that caused our homelessness.

Da Ugly Ducklin – The Transparent Me 7/25/15 (DAY 6)

Today is SEEK HIS FACE SATURDAY and make sure you read a scripture, Pray, Praise or Worship Him today.

Christian wife/ Muslim husband (How you interact) (Praying, Praising & Worshipping together impossible)

Me seeing the aftermath of my two sisters after getting brutally beating (Reason for my hostility toward men)

Women should stay in their place (We cannot beat NO man)

A mother’s job is NEVER done (Talk to your grown child) (Help them identify and then succeed at their goals)

Feeling ostracized after alcohol cease (How to enjoy life when everyone else still indulges)

Family should never see each other homeless (Well to do family won’t help SMH)

Never seclude your mate because you have no friends or family to chill with.

Da Ugly Ducklin – The Transparent Me 7/26/15 (DAY 7)

Today is SUPPORT SOMEONE SUNDAY and I ask that you support anyone in any capacity… Heaven smiles upon us for doing so.

This was a short video, that I’m not pleased with at all. Just had an altercation with my husband, and wasn’t feeling myself… My apologies.

Either the enemy is causing bad things to occur, because I’m following the plan of God for my life or God sees that my husband means me no well, and chose to remove him from my life.

FEEDBACK WELCOMED!!!

Da Ugly Ducklin – The Transparent Me 7/23/15 (DAY 4)

 

Not too pleased with today’s Vlog, because I got to talking about the beating at the hands of my last husband, and lost my whole train of thought… gggggggrrrrrrrrrrrrrhhhhhhhhhhhhhh. Nonetheless, I went on with it, and talked about how God has kept me, and is still keeping me through all the craziness that I’ve endured and still experiencing.

Today is “Thank Him Thursday” be sure to THANK God for everything He’s done and still is doing in your life. He inhabits the Praises of His people.

*** Please comment on how you feel about poverty, generational curses, and utilizing government assistance.

Once again I ask y’all to forgive the video pauses, before you know it I’ll be making top-notch Vlogs.

As promised, I’m going to do my research on the Chris Brown incident, as it relates to what he’s experiencing with suicidal thoughts. I don’t EVER wanna mislead anyone, by giving inaccurate or totally bogus information.

Please follow me, subscribe to my channel on YouTube, and likewise I’ll return the favor.

Da Ugly Ducklin – The Transparent Me 7/22/15 (DAY 3)

Please forgive me for the dumb videos that end abruptly, without a proper outro message. But, time will definitely fix that, as I get more better at recording. Eventually, I’ll have a better device, with a huger storage. However, until then I ask you to bear with me.

I was cut off while explaining what happened with my last husband, and why we separated. As I was telling you, I made the horrible mistake of marrying way too quick from start. But, I was terribly lonely. Remember, I have ALL grown children, and they were moving on with their lives and happy for the most part… going out to eat, coupled up. Beach trips, constantly at the casino or club. Even though some of the places they frequented, I’m no longer interested in, I still wanted a mate, and I jumped at the very first chance that came my way and the latter months was beyond overkill. Not to mention the fact that I wasn’t really over my previous husband, who I’m BACK with SMH, and that’ll be elaborated on as time progresses. Moreover, I carried hurt and all types of other damaging baggage over into my marriage, thus reaping unnecessary havoc for myself.

I was constantly bickering, complaining, nitpicking and physically abusing this man, and he held it all in until it came out in the worst way on that gruesome night, turned morning, beat down that I received, where God once again spared my life. now, this time, I wasn’t able to drive myself to the hospital like before and not because of any physical impairments. But, primarily because my husband didn’t want to leave me alone with in the ER, in fear of me contacting the police.

Enough of that already though, before too much explaining rolls into flashbacks, and emotions causes diverse reactions. I can’t say when I’ll discuss it. But, I wanna give my testimony about my reunification with my third husband, and how we’re doing now.

Da Ugly Ducklin – The Transparent Me 6/28/15 (Trial run – My first video trying out Vlogging)

This is my first attempt at Vlogging, and it was in June… I never could get the videos uploaded, so I completely gave up. But, I started back a month and a half later, and those are the videos on the site that are still not as good as I would like for them to be. But, I feel confident that I’m finally doing what’s pleasing to God. Even though they’re choppy and some are too long, in my opinion. Nevertheless, it satisfies my charge from above.

To recap: I discussed my reasons for getting away from the whole psychological team of nitwits, and it’s simply because thy weren’t doing me any good whatsoever!!! In fact, I spoke out about two drugs specifically that I’m not to fond of at all, and that’s Trazodone, because it causes shortness of breath and makes me feels anxious, and as if I’m hyperventilating. And lithium simply because I’m worried about any medication that gives cause for my blood to be continually monitored SMH… Nope, I’m GUCCI!!!

To add, I don’t know how to put the fact that I see NO need for repetitive trips to see therapist and psychiatrist no clearer than I have, with so much seriousness to back… I mean it’s absolutely ridiculous to make all these appointments, in an effort to find the “NORM” as most people call it, to no avail. I’m through being toyed with!!! Together with God and the testimonies of overcomers I’m gonna master my care without fake anecdotes and meaningless couch conversations.

I mentioned the stabbing that gave rise to my arrest, that aided in my eventual psychological assessment and corrupt diagnosis. My daughter, her husband and I were on our way home from picking him (her husband) up from his granny’s house when I rode up on the worse scene I’d ever encountered. My husband, openly walking with a female, who I later found to be his mistress for several months prior… I literally lost my mind. How dare you!!! Right in the neighborhood we met and married in. That’s making a total mockery of me, seeing as how EVERYONE knows we’re married, and have been together for three years before this craziness, and you even have the audacity to flaunt her around, while still bringing me around your friends and family members, who obviously knew about your secret rendezvous. But, continued to smile in my face as if everything’s all well and fine… Some nerve SMH. Nevertheless, the whole ordeal plays out with me going with the police, him with the paramedics, and the floozy running away, at record speed, with my Tasmanian devil daughter in HIGH pursuit lol. That was a day I never wanna see again, and Prayerfully no one else has to ever experience.

Da Ugly Ducklin – The Transparent Me 7/21/15 (DAY 2)

I’m sooooooooo happy… God tells us to take the first step, out on Faith, towards any endeavor, and He’ll provide the INCREASE. I did just that, in spite of all my insecurities and uncertainties, and each video is getting better as I go.

To elaborate, the messages above refer to some hard times I experienced years ago while I was still a babe in Christ, and not at all able to properly rationalize, and almost lost my life because of it on several occasions.

Also, spoke about Miracle Man, a vessel for God who also ran from his calling, and underwent a detrimental mishap before totally surrendering, and is now disfigured for life.

I can’t believe I took this long to heed to His (God’s) beckoning, for me to open up in this way. I actually like it, and Prayerfully it’ll help as many people as possible, to heal, and also the feedback that I receive will enhance my healing process as well.

I love being able to expound on the GOODNESS of God, as in He as been ever so present and helpful in my life from day one. And even though I’m going through a trying time right now, I know undoubtedly that none of it is in vain, and I’ll reap the benefits soon enough if I faint NOT!!!

The Transparent Me (Day 1)

This is the start of a new way I’m going to interact. I’ve been blogging for years, to no avail, and I earnestly believe that it’s meant for me to visually convey my messages. To be honest, it took me this long because I’m not happy with the way I look on camera. But, If God has a purpose for you, you’ll get it done, according to His Will eventually… No matter how long you run.

I don’t doubt that the reason I’ve been going through soooooo much is due to my procrastination and fear. “NO MORE”!!! I’m BAAAAAACCCCCKKKK, and I know I’ve said that many many times before, then I’ll fall away again… My apologies, trust me I’m full to the brim, and it’s about to spill over… Don’t believe me JUST WATCH 🙂 🙂 🙂

How can you mend a broken heart???

https://www.facebook.com/groups/hcymabh/

A Facebook group I started in 2008, during the most desperate and desolate point of my life, while in need of like minded supporters.

I was lonely, angry, sad, suicidal and down right hopeless!!! This congregation of hurting people helped me heal, and I returned the favor. Today, the group is flourishing, and I feel bad that I’m not as active as before, because my marriage is better than I could’ve ever imagined. So, I don’t really have much to write about.

Nevertheless, I gotta realize that I made a commitment, and as long as they need me I have to be there for them, just as they were for me years ago… It’s all about creativity, even if it means surfing the web, until I find relevant information to share, then that’s what it’ll be… Because I will not shut them out, no matter how good things go in my life!!! Neeeeeevvvveeerr forget where you came from.

BnfEnT (CEO Son Son – DMV)

Better at what I say then what I do SMH… Jesus Plllleeeeeaaaaassssseeee HHHEEEELLLLPPPP me!!!

I know sooooooo well how to counsel, advise and help everyone stay strong and show forth Faith in the midst of tests. But, when the tables turn I get sooooooo weak and act out… I hate, hate, hate this about myself.

I gotta record myself ministering to others or something, and be able to quickly playback the audio, to defeat the enemy, by not getting depressed or stressed, and prove to him that I do in fact trust God to do just what He says and really and truly believe it in my heart of hearts also.

The darts just keep coming so fast, that it’s hard to get my footing. And the Holy Spirit is immaculate, because He’s teaching right as I’m typing and I’m now able to see the good in my situation either way.

Point at hand: I allowed myself to be scammed Friday, something I always kept a defense against ordinarily, and would’ve never been so naive. But, these people seemed so convincing… Really had a call back number, answering as IRS and appeared to really be in a legit call center and all, and my husband had in fact applied for financial aid. So, I fail for it SMH.

Low and behold, the monies were placed on a greendot card, and I was feeling better because one young lady got my hopes up by having me email her documents to prove I was the initial card holder and in deed was a victim of fraud. But, I got a disturbing reply this morning, that tore me all to pieces. Thus, making me shun and be mean to my husband all over again… When I wasted the entire Friday already in despair and acting ugly… Took off from work, causing myself more loss, wouldn’t eat… Just in the dumps wanting a pity party I guess and for him to feel terrible… I know better, but I couldn’t get myself outta the stupor.

Not today, just as the Holy Spirit showed me… My father is rich and owns the cattle on a thousand hills… He can bring back that and more money and it don’t have to be from greendot… I just have to trust and believe and be ever so careful not to lash out while I wait!!! I can’t lie, I’m humanly mad at the fact that both individuals are able to get away with their actions and my hands are inadvertently tied. The scammers can’t be found and greendot are rightfully doing this to me because of clauses in their policy that cover them SMH… I don’t feel it’s right one bit though, especially since I have proof that I have the card in my possession and the people who falsely registered the card and used the funds cannot produce the same proofs ggggrrrrrrhhhhhh… Tests are hard. But, with the help of the Holy Spirit we’ll pass and eventually benefit from doing what’s right no matter what we face.

BnfEnT (CEO Son Son – DMV)

Sooooooo angry at myself!!!

Just what in the world is wrong with me??? “If God be for me, WHO can be against me?”

I gotta stop letting the enemy reap havoc in my life, and I go curl up under bushes, with my tail tucked… Whimpering and subdued… I’m a child of God, an heir of God and a joint heir with Christ Jesus!!!

God has placed tooooooo much in me for me to keep shutting down on His work!!!

My deepest apologies to everyone who has been willing to back me on His endeavor. But, watched me inadvertently sink into that ridiculous nearly two week depression phase… I’m just grateful that God knows me through and through; enough to know that I wasn’t arbitrarily saying no I won’t do it, because other secular issues and/or opportunities took premise.

But rather He saw the distractions the adversary created for me, to veer me off course, and He had to send the right people along to pull me back. I’d like to thank each one of you for continuing to message me, in spite of my silence, during my trying time… That is nobody but God, to keep you steadfast, amidst my craziness… Thanks, thanx… Then thanx one more again!!!

Everybody… Alone No More is about to take off… Hurting individuals will have the love, compassion, attention, affection, care, concern, time, and anything else they need!!! God purposely saved me from twelve obnoxious suicide attempts, and I suffer from Nooooooo brain damage at all… Actually, I’m ridiculously intelligent… Which shows He’s ever so present in my life. Therefore, onward I go… In His service!!!

I’m BBBBAAAAACCCCCKKKKK 🙂 🙂 🙂

BnfEnT (CEO Son Son – DMV)

Be ANGRY but sin NOT…

I could only be furious with myself right now, because I’m the one who made the dumb mistake, and it’s so ironic, because I’m a stickler for checking everything twice.

Knowing that what God gave me is for a worthy cause and much needed, I really looked to see if the many individuals who viewed and liked the post had in fact taken the initiative to give a donation, only to find out the link was faulty SMH.

Do, I get frustrated and denounce the entire VISION due to one set back, merely on day 1 of implementation… Lord Nooooooo!!! I’m no quitter and the race is not giving to the swift, but rather to those who’ll ENDURE till the end.

That just means I have to do extra work to gain back the number of supporters who temporarily missed the opportunity to assist. Plllleeeeeaaaaassssseeee forgive me ggggrrrrrrhhhhhh!!!

Nevertheless, here’s the correct link http://e.gofund.me/h2r43w

Also, I’ve added a few stories to the gofundme page, just to enlighten all on the many families who have collectively been affected by the stigma of suicide. Some without warning, thus no perpetration or chance to help at all.

That’s why this app is so important. We’ll be right at the hurting party’s fingertips. Pain and anguish can strike at any giving time of the day or night. And Alone No More will be readily available at everyone’s beckoning.

BnfEnT (CEO Son Son – DMV)

Alone No More (Gofundme) info

I have no clue how to write proposals. So, I’ll raise money to hire someone to do that. Then, prayerfully get grant money to move forward with the app, website and team of helpers.

I know it’s gon be expensive and I’ll need energy to work two jobs and bring this all together. But, God is gonna give me His strength when I feel weak or bogged down.

http://e.gofund.me/h2r43w

Please at least pass that link around… It could be someone close to you next… Don’t overlook or criticize because it hasn’t hit home yet, and prayerfully it Neeeeeevvvveeerr does. Nonetheless, help in any way you can Plllleeeeeaaaaassssseeee.

BnfEnT (CEO Son Son – DMV)

Write the VISION and make it plain!!!

After experiences with suicidal thoughts firsthand, then seeing how prevalent it is with celebrities and others who one would think are established and shouldn’t even be experiencing such problems that’ll ever make them feel worthless, hopeless or inadequate; further proves that suicidal tendencies has nuttin to do with how much money you have nor does popularity make a difference. Hurting people are everywhere… And I wanna HHHEEEELLLLPPPP!!!

Alone No More

Is a non profit organization I wanna structure, that will operate 24 hrs a day and have an app attached to it, so that none will have to waste time dialing numbers to get help. What if they’ve already taken the pills or injured themselves, but have a change of heart, and too weak to dial out. This app will stay on the home screen (widget) and instantly a live counselor pops up and will be able to get your exact location, so long as GPS and location are both engaged on your device.

Also, with the app, say for instance you’re merely in the beginning phase of your plan, and you’re maybe able to just talk to someone and perhaps get to feeling better altogether. The counselor will either spend the needed time with you themselves or get someone local to respond to your location, in case you prefer face to face interactions.

Alone No More

Will have 24 hrs private prayer closets throughout the cities, for anyone to drop in as needed whenever, and they can choose whether they’d like for someone to pray with/for them or they want to spend time with God alone. Yes, we can pray anywhere. But, some people feel better in places that’s dedicated to/for the primary purpose of prayer.

Alone No More

Will either be staffed (on standby) at hospitals and and psychiatric associations, because everybody don’t just need to be medicated and locked on a ward, left alone to still think about your problems. Rather, talking it through is more helpful. Every time I’ve been committed the actual facility I was in did nuttin beneficial for me, aside from food, arts and crafts, an abundance of snacks and tons of mind altering drugs. The crazy thing is you end up lying, and saying your issue has diminished, just so you can finally get home. But, the problem just goes right with you. Instead, Alone No More will take the time to get to the root of your issue, and help you with therapy that surpasses sitting on a couch, going over family history and all the shenanigans. The time together will be spent doing whatever you enjoy, yet while still rectifying your problem. You’ll gain a new helpful friend.

However, this VISION will be expensive and time consuming. I need help writing proposals and staff to work with, ideas on how to turn these thoughts into reality. I can’t do this by myself, although I can see exactly how it should be structured. It’s gon take a committed team of US to pull this together. Come along and let’s put an end to suicide as best we know how… Giving the love that’s needed one click of the app at a time.

BnfEnT (CEO Son Son – DMV)

Because I STOOD… God’s up to something GOOD

It’s always surprised me that I have more war wounds, arrests, and hard times than my only brother and all of the males in my extended family… I’ve Neeeeeevvvveeerr come to grips with why I was so rambunctious, angry and mean… Something in my childhood obviously caused the hideous behavior, and it’s purely the Grace of God that kept my standing and living through it all SMH!

Beat for seven hours, in the interim, loss conscious, I STOOD

Jumped by eight humongous women, while an acquaintance of their stood watch with a pump shotgun I STOOD

Car flipped three times on highway, unexplainably I STOOD

Head and face split wide open, with 40 oz. beer bottle, skull exposed I STOOD

Mother’s Day – should’ve been haaaappppyyyy… Assaulted, with unknown object, entire face bloodied, four front (permanent) teeth gone I STOOD

And the list goes on and on, of the terrible things I endured before knowing Christ as I do now… “Any man be in Christ is a NEW creature, old things are past away, behold all things are made Nnnnnneeeeeeewwwwwww” and I had to emphasize (new) to show just how excited I am about my future.

The devil really tried to take my life on many occasions… But God!!! Until your purpose for God is fulfilled on earth, Nooooooo worries, the enemy can’t take you out, and I’m just getting started… So, look out satan. I mean, he succeeded in roughing me up and giving me a few lifelong scars, but I’m still standing, and those scars are simply reminders of the chaotic days he had me running ramped, with Nooooooo regard for human life SMH.

Those days are gone, God snatched me up, and told me to run on; this race set before, and that’s the best thing that ever could’ve happen for me… Today, I’m drug and alcohol free. I don’t do clubs or house parties, I work daily and come home. NO MORE fighting and craziness… I live my life for Christ and thus shall reap all the benefits… And I patiently wait, knowing He’s up to something GOOD 🙂 🙂 🙂

Follow me as I allow Christ to LEAD!!!

Avoid LONELINESS and settle for utter DISRESPECT

Not!!! I just gotta keep myself busy… Maaaaannnnnnn, I thought surely by today at least I’d be feeling a llliiiitttttttllllleeeee bit stronger geeeesssssshhhhh :-(:-(:-(:-(:-(

Then, I thought about firing back up my Tagged and Kik accounts, perhaps that’ll keep me occupied. But, that’s simply a temporary cure, in a place where I need a permanent healing… Daddy, I need You!!! This is one of them times where I could use a great big fatherly hug, and lay my head on His shoulder and cry for a few ticks (((((((TEARS)))))))

Nonetheless, before I’ll save myself from the broken feelings and bring him back, only for me to risk another broken heart in two to three weeks… Nooooooo, I won’t even put myself through the agony. I know all too well that he’ll Neeeeeevvvveeerr change! So, let me stop allowing him to take me down on a monthly basis… With no remorse each time. Of course, he does his whimpering, just to get his foot back in the door. But, obviously it’s not sincere or it wouldn’t be a repetitive norm for us… I’m fed up to the max!!!

Therefore, self you had better snap outta this craziness, of even considering to let him come back into your life, to destroy you over and over again! Where’s your self worth? That inkling that says to you… “Girl, you’re beautiful, and any real man, in his right mind, would love to have you, and treat you like the Queen God intended”

As long as I keep settling, why should he change, if nothing forces him to??? There’s never no repercussions for this unfair treatment, he’s just out of the house for a couple days, then brought right back, to get all the rewards a good husband deserves, and I’m sure he laughs deep within; like “look at this retard, I can do anything to her, and she’ll keep taking me back” and that helps him think I have low self esteem, and accept his mess, because I believe I can’t do any better than him… Lies you tell!!! And I’ll show you this time around… Trust me, I’ll be strong before you know it, and I will move on for sure :-):-):-)

No lookin BBBBAAAAACCCCCKKKKK, I’m gone Mr Maaaaannnnnnn… You lost out, and that’s not a threat, but a promise!!! One man’s trash will be another man’s treasure… Don’t believe me… Just WATCH :-):-):-)

Question:

When God said forgive seventy times seven… Was adultery included?

Does forgiveness mean allow him to come home?

Note: keep in mind this ain’t something later found out about, this gentleman really pulled an all nighter with the other female!!!

Follow me as I allow Christ to LEAD!!!