It’s a hard knock life for ME

NOT understanding why is causing my confusion. How WILL I EVER get to sleep at night??? Were ALL those good days fraudulent? If so, you deserve an Oscar!!! How could I EVER be so stupid, NOT to have seen this coming beforehand and readied myself for it all… SMH ggggrrrrrrhhhhhh 😦

I haven’t a clue as to why this is taking place the way it is, but I Pray with EVERYTHING in me that God keeps me strong enough NOT to be all suicidal AGAIN… I’m tired of the emotional rollercoaster. I’m sitting at work thinking that it’ll all be good in this or that amount of time, but clearly I really don’t know how long the grieving process will TAKE, especially because I don’t know in the first place why you’re leaving me to start.

I’m feeling that it can’t be another female because I check your phone and it’s ALWAYS empty of calls and texts, but you may have mastered a way to keep it all hidden from me, if that is the case, just know karma is REAL.

I further keep feeling like my healing will take long because I have no friends or family near me to keep my mind off you and depression is adamant in that case. I was gon get on a dating site, just to keep myself busy and in an effort to ward off being somber, but that’s just a temporary fix that I don’t wanna be bothered with… Geeeesssssshhhhh life’s a bi+¢π then you die!!!

Prayers Plllleeeeeaaaaassssseeee

In need of HELP

Hello,

My name is Paulette Williams and I work daily for USPS and have my own means of transportation. However, as of May 31, 2016 my husband and I will need a place to stay. I can’t afford much, but I’m willing to pay our way. We will take a basement, single room, RV, or even a shed.

OLD to me… NEW for you!!!

Noooooo sleep crew… check-in!!! WYA & WYD??? is a little slogan I add to my Facebook timeline every time  I’m up for no unlikely reason, with seemingly nuttin to do… WRONG!!! God’s not dead. Therefore, it’s always sum’n to do, as long as all the craziness is going on in the world all around me. That’s when Praying in the Spirit becomes imperative.

I find myself angry a lot because my rental unit, that God Blessed me with is even further away from my family then the shelter was, and it appears I’m always lonely. But, that’s definitely a part of God’s Perfect Plan for my life. God knows exactly what He wants to do through me. But, I have to pure, open, humble and totally surrendered. READY to be that conduit that He can use.

Believe it or not… this video has nuttin to do with anything I just mentioned. It’s actually from 9/29/15, and never got uploaded because I was stupidly quitting again… But, I’mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm Back!!!

No coveting, what they have God will give you!!!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JlH-82nIyrk

I can feel myself getting jealous, angry and nearly bitter towards ALL the people in my office who’s happily making six figures, driving fancy cars that are either paid for or for sure the notes ain’t backed up. And the same goes for their homes, they’re ALWAYS walking around talking bout meeting with realtors and either successfully paying off their houses or about to buy a SECOND home ggggrrrrrrhhhhhh.

This afternoon when I was leaving I was sooooooo hurt,I didn’t want nobody looking at me, make less saying stuff to me… Normally we ALL day drive safe, see you in the morning… Buuuuuutttttttt, today I just wasn’t myself, and acted like the Grinch who stole Christmas. Bad thing though, it ain’t even the people’s fault who I was shunning SMH.

So, I felt God leading me to my PO Box. So, I’m assuming definitely it’s either a letter about one of the jobs or an apartment is coming through, to make me feel better, since I was in a terrible stupor… NOT!!!

I just shook my head and said… “Yet will I trust YOU” Ultimately, that’s exactly what it’s ALL about, the enemy trynna break me down to the point where I Nooooooo longer see God as Worthy of ALL Praise, Honor and Glory, because He’s arbitrarily leaving me in this chaotic mess I’m experiencing… And I’m not able to see nooooooo evidence whatsoever of Him actively working things out on my behalf SMH. Still, I won’t waver in my Faith… He promised to Neeeeeevvvveeerr leave me nor forsake be, and He’s a God Who cannot and will not lie. Sooooooo, that means what I need is for sure for sure coming… Buuuuuutttttttt, whenever He’s ready to deliver and set me free from the bondage that I haphazardly got myself into.

It’s a FAMILY AFFAIR!!!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2MGjW4C0BIc

The pic is my only son’s baby son. He’s actually in the the Vlog, and he made sure to give a shout out to his Father for being a well known rapper from Washington DC… I thought that was sooooooo cute.

God is AWESOME, and actually got two of my three daughters to come to Church today and six of my grandchildren… I have not stopped smiling since they arrived.

My daughter had to finish off my hair, which turned out beautiful… and while she did I cooked up some good ole chicken that was mouth watering good… ALL the adults was licking their fingers and complementing me, and that just made my smilitis worse lol.

I was sooooooo haaaappppyyyy about the message God sent their way, because they were really captivated and listening. Therefore, I’m convinced that they’re not too far off from God’s Grace, and it won’t take much to reel them back in.

My son, in the other hand, will just have to come on his own, as God speaks to his heart. My daughter said don’t force him, because he’ll simply reject it more and more each time, to the point where he may start avoiding me altogether. But, Prayer changes things and God is ultimately in control and can get my son’s attention way far better than I EVER could… So, patiently I await!!!