Author: shootahdcpassion

44 yrs. old, employed by the Federal Government. I have four grown children and eleven grandchildren, whom I love very much. This blog will be used to help me deal with Bipolar, which I was diagnosed with in 2000.

Holding on to Heaven while YOUR husband goes THROUGH hell!

I purposely added emphasis to the word THROUGH to show that I indeed have FAITH that he’ll eventually come out of this craziness that he’s bogged down with, and OUR marriage shall be harmonious.

I will say this though, it’s NOT as bad as before. There were years of blatant in-your-face disrespect occurring, with different women and infidelity, and I was Soooooo blindly in love that I excepted ANY and everything he put me THROUGH. After some time, I did grow wiser and I ultimately ended the relationship altogether. But, it is obvious that God wants US together. I mean WE spent ten years away from each other, and both of us married other people. Nonetheless, here WE are… BACK IN STRIDE AGAIN 🙂 🙂 🙂

No doubt, I PRAY and long for God to send me a man who has already converted… I know things WILL be Soooooo much BETTER… we can PRAY and fellowship TOGETHER, I won’t have to worry about HIM cheating, because the conviction within will tear him ALL to pieces. Reading the Bible as one would be POWERFUL, because God delights in marriage. Therefore, the revelation knowledge from on high would be mind boggling… But, I’d ENJOY every second of it 🙂 🙂 🙂

In fact, God’s word says “How can two walk TOGETHER unless they agree” and I always think about that passage of scripture whenever problems arise with US, and I honestly consider breaking it off with HIM at times… But, sum always pulls me BACK. But, for ANY grasping advice from this post… I’d rather you wait on marriage until you’re both genuinely walking upright before God, so that He can lead, guide and direct the both of you on HOW to treat one another.

It’s MORE to marriage then mere intimacy… God WILL show you how to enjoy each other on dates, vacations or JUST sitting around the house play fighting, cuddling while watching a movie, board games, and most importantly dating MUST Neeeeeevvvveeerr cease… it don’t matter that you’ve been together for umpteen years… spending quality alone time TOGETHER outside the bedroom is essential to healthy marriages.

Then, we have the issue of HIM indulging in elicit drugs… my therapist and one of my girlfriends thinks that’s a numero uno deal breaker… I beg to differ, as crazy as it may seem… actually he’s at his best when he’s euphoric… I become his queen literally. I get my food brought to me at bedside, the entire house gets thoroughly cleaned, and his personality is way calmer and KEEPS us at PEACE. And he makes a good point, doctors, lawyers, police and even congressmen smoke… I have NO clue of the validity in that statement, but for ALL it’s worth, him being HIGH don’t affect me and he’s NOT sabotaging things in and around OUR house… so, I don’t trip too bad 🙂 🙂 🙂

Nevertheless, once Jesus gets a grip on Him, ALL that’s gone FALL off. I didn’t do drugs, but I was a terrible alcoholic before, I’m talking violent and chaotic… unbearable to even be around, and God TOTALLY delivered me… Soooooo, I’m convinced my husband is soon to come THROUGH this mess the enemy is using to deter him from what’s Godly right for HIM. I just continue to let my light shine before HIM and eventually he’ll notice my good works and glorify OUR father IN heaven… God got US, HE promised NEVER to put MORE on US than WE can bear… And I reiterate, as long as ALL is well with me and my babies, then I CAN stick in here WITH him until his day of salvation.

Jesus saves!!!

by shootahdcpassion

U say “IMPOSSIBLE”… God says it’s on its way!!!

It’s NOT about what you know… But, rather WHO you know, and I repetitively decree and declare that Imma child of God, an heir of God and a joint heir with Christ Jesus 🙂 🙂 🙂 Noooooooooo good thing shall EVER be withheld from me.

Daily my DADDY is teaching me how to walk in this newness, I mean everything about you MUST convert WHEN you give YOUR life to Christ wholeheartedly. God WILL show you how NOT to settle for functioning in dysfunction… before, I was a total wreck, worrying about this, and trynna fix that… “NO MORE” God says to me, instead I am to worry about nothing and PRAY about everything 🙂 🙂 🙂

God is showing me that His Favor is ALL over me, and Blessings are IN deed tracking me down. ALL God needs from me besides my sanctification and righteousness, is for me to be transparent with HIM about my desires… HE says “write the vision and MAKE it plain!” Because I’m destined for wealth, healthy living and success… God gives me the opportunity to let HIM know exactly how I WANT my mansion to look… even down to the furniture, curtains, nick nacks and artwork.

Fam, if you’ve given YOUR life to Christ and you’re confident that you’re at least trying YOUR hardest to walk upright before HIM, then TRUST and believe that you’re fearfully and wonderfully made, and NO good thing shall EVER be withheld from you either… what God does for one of His, He’ll DO for ALL. Day by day God is shedding low self esteem, negative thinking, problems, hate, envy, strife and jealousy from me… It’s NOT of HIM… therefore, it has NO place in me 🙂 🙂 🙂

My DADDY determines I shall live an abundant, prosperous and FAITH filled LIFE, and Noooooooooo weapon formed against me shall prosper. Kinda cliche right??? “NO MORE” living average or in poverty… feeling like JUST making it is ok… mediocrity isn’t in my DNA… My DADDY owns the cattle on a thousand hills… and what father don’t WANT the best for his child???

Fam, monitor the way you think… tell YOUR children and yourself constantly ALL good things are ahead… KEEP YOUR mind stayed on God, and He’ll KEEP you in perfect PEACE… Neeeeeevvvveeerr forget, an idle mind is the devil’s playground… and he’s NOT to get one second to be lackadaisical in OUR quarters point blank period!!! Adhere to the words I speak, and know that what Blessings I receive is stored up for you as well… JUST give YOUR life to Christ and He’ll MAKE it alright.

Jesus saves!!!

by shootahdcpassion

H.U.T. (HOLDING US TOGETHA)

This here acronym is well known to my babies, and has derived to be an uh oh moment for them. But, I don’t like that one bit, and it MUST change!!!

H.U.T. initially evolved because I wasn’t HAPPY about the fact that my children had matured into adults and were pursuing their own lives, and I didn’t get to see them as often as I wanted to, and I surprisingly was MISSING all (11) of my grandchildren. Well, to be quite honest, things haven’t improved at ALL since the plan of action was supposedly set in motion… But, that’s the reason for this post 🙂 🙂 🙂

FAMILY is Ohhhhh Soooooo important to me, and I struggle with the fact that my siblings and I aren’t as close as desired, which MEANS I look even more for my IMMEDIATE family to fill the void… then, I don’t have girlfriends that I spend quality time with. So, I long for ATTENTION from my babies. Purposely, so that I don’t become a burden to them, I ONLY require that we ALL get TOGETHER once a month… Now, of course WHEN God Blesses US with MORE time TOGETHER that’s a plus.

There’s nothing like seeing my babies smiling and laughing WITH one another, while WE reminisce about old times. The uh oh moment I referred to earlier is regarding the ZERO tolerance rule that’s been in affect since each child broke through the womb… my babies are NOT allowed altercations and grudges… NO way shape, form or fashion will I EVER stand for that. As children, when sibling rivalry reared its ugly head, they had to stand in the middle of the floor hugging for hours, if NEED be, unless they quickly resolved their spat.

The ELEVEN I mentioned are growing daily, and doing new exciting things on the regular… I MUST be a part of ALL that. Noooooooooo longer am I settling for mobile phone videos and pics… H E double hockey sticks NO… I want to see those special moments in the flesh 🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂

God is AWESOME, this morning HE had me write my sister and ask her to help me formulate a FAMILY reunion. Now, that’ll suffice the entire FAMILY coming TOGETHER… But, won’t replace my expectations for FAMILY orientation amongst my clan… sorry, but you won’t get off that easy!!!

The entire summer, ALL I did was cringe EVERY time I opened Facebook, because families, that WE have known for years, was doing da mug… turnt up – TOGETHER, like they were suppose to be… I’m talking bout endless pics, representing the fun and happiness they were experiencing… Noooooooooo MORE, from this day forward, my babies BETTER get ready, cause it’s on and popping… EVERY month WE will be hooking up, the whole lineage -TOGETHER doing sum big… I won’t have it NO other way.

Shoot, my grandchildren WILL know, by mimicking US, how to interact with each other once they make their own families… I WANT them to be able to say… “Man, ALL I remember was my Nana made ALL us get TOGETHER monthly and do something fun, and I really appreciated OUR time together… Soooooo, I’m implementing the same course of action for me and mine”

“Train up a child in the way they should go, and WHEN they’re older, they won’t depart from it” Reciprocation and repetition is essential for growing babies… they witness reciprocated love and happiness amongst the adults in their atmosphere and environment… As they reach adulthood they’ll carry on in the same manner. Also, if the outings and togetherness is repetitious, they’ll see that interactions with FAMILY MEMBERS has to be numero uno.

Love you ALL, let Jesus teach you how to KEEP your FAMILY close 🙂 🙂 🙂

Jesus saves!!!

by shootahdcpassion

My MICROWAVE help :-) :-) :-) :-) :-) :-) :-)

God is AWESOME, I mean I sit in awe of how HE shows up and shows out for me, and Fam believe me… HE can and will do the same for you.

ALL day I’ve been smiling, and I know my son MUST think I have special powers lol. Nope, I JUST have a POWERFUL connection with my father, who controls everything earthly, and surprisingly sped up the process on NOT one thing, but HE speedily delivered several things to US in record times. NOW tell me HE ain’t tight!!!

Normally, I’d have to sit on hold with my insurance company, and maybe get transferred to like eight DIFFERENT people before my PROBLEM would be resolved… NOT anymore, my DADDY has me at the forefront, like I’m Obama’s daughter or somebody of real importance… that lady answered the phone, hit a few buttons and wallah… documents transmitted way across town, to alleviate my predicament… Ohhhhh yoppington 🙂 🙂 🙂

My condo had my money tied up… supposedly, the hold wouldn’t drop off for seven to fourteen days… NOT for me, the conference call took perhaps 17 minutes at most… and what do you know… you’ll Neeeeeevvvveeerr guess… I’ll tell you… RELEASED!!! Imma child of the most high God… Noooooooooo good thing shall EVER be withheld from me…

Normally, when I have to go do bills each month, I dread the wait time at the post office… honey, let me tell ya… Ms Thang must’ve had her Wheaties this morning… because she whipped through at least ELEVEN of us in a matter of 23 minutes… when I walked in, faces were sour, people looking intermittently at their watches, and shaking their heads in frustration… but my PRESENCE; all filled with the marvelous Holy Spirit… the atmosphere changed for the BETTER, and things got cracking… that’s HOW my DADDY twerks!!!

I JUST love God, because I see things looking up for me, in MORE ways than one… This is off subject, but a MUST tell… I see a therapist EVERY week… the same lady each time… let me tell you HOW my DADDY fixes situations in OUR lives… the therapist has to come to the lobby to take you BACK to her office. She steps out, calls my name, I walk towards her, she extends her hand and introduces herself… weird but intriguing… with a shocked look I said to her… Uhhhhh, we’ve met, it’s me Paulette… She nearly hit the floor… I looked Soooooo good, she couldn’t believe it. Now I’m NOT tooting my own horn… instead giving Praises to God for IMMEDIATE healing and transformation.

Fam, this testimonial TODAY is for ALL to see the goodness of God flowing EVER so graciously IN my LIFE… and guess what… IT JUST gets BETTER WITH time.

Jesus saves!!!

by shootahdcpassion

With is GOOD… But, in is BETTER… It’s time!!!

Practical relationships pertain to those whom we’re WITH at any giving point (siblings, co workers, physician, mate, child, friend or even strangers on public transportation or individuals you pass while shopping). However, phantom on what it’s like, to have the goodness of the Holy Spirit living within you. Boy oh boy, what a relief it is 🙂 🙂 🙂

Change is adamant and evident… the places you use to go start to disgust you, when you ride by the same club you once frequented, and see the beautiful ladies with their revealing attire on, you may have the audacity to turn up your nose at them, and shake your head in utter disbelief, that any female would EVER dare to carry herself in that manner… shame on her!!! Giiiiirrrrrrrlllllll, how soon Weeeeeeeee forget. If it weren’t for Grace, you’d be in line with, before or after her… MORE than likely, looking much skankier… Soooooo, PRAY for your sister “NEVER look down on a man/woman, unless you’re picking them up… don’t get it twisted. God loves ALL alike 🙂 🙂 🙂

But, let me NOT act like those wonderful PRAYER instincts kick in normally… Lawd Noooooooooo, humans are naturally judgmental, unless you’ve been converted and filled with the marvelous Holy Spirit I interjected earlier… He brings about the difference in US… Him flowing through US unctions US to change OUR actions, reactions, responses and remarks.

Being changed wholeheartedly causes you to care more about others and their wellbeing. So, when you cross paths with anyone who suffers from or struggles with what you were delivered from, your heart will go out to them, in ways that wants them to have the good life you NOW experience.

Remember the individuals WE live WITH, trust me we’ll NEED the Holy Spirit daily, in dealing with them, JUST to help us cope. Take for instance siblings… the mass majority of us either gossip together or about one another… That’s Ohhhhh Soooooo wrong, get that out you quick… it’s NOT godly nor healthy. So, cut it off at the root.

Co workers, jealousy may be an issue here… “for real, Bonquisha got a promotion, hmmmm she MUST be sleeping with somebody”… don’t do that, slander is horrible and can mess up people’s reputation. Mind your business, PRAY and ask God for your increase, and Thhhaaannnkkk God for blessing Bonquisha, and you’ll be NEXT.

Children, uh Ohhhhh… them lil rascals drive you to drink… too bad, you gotta love em and encourage them… be careful not to curse at em, take misplaced anger out on them, and Neeeeeevvvveeerr downgrade them… rather build them up, tell em they’re attractive, smart and destined for success… and I reiterate, this won’t be easy tasks, if attempted alone… NO way, you deftly NEED the Holy Spirit living within you, in order for you to refrain from fleshy ways.

Common people in the streets… they gon test you… That’s life, but HOW you respond makes ALL the difference. You can choose to fly off the handle, and risk possibly going to jail unnecessarily or you can allow the Holy Spirit to have His way in the matter, and KEEP the PEACE. Of course, we weren’t raised to be punks, and that’s fine and understandable. But, avoiding chaos doesn’t suggest that you’re less than; actually it proves YOUR growth and level of maturity.

Fam, I can’t emphasize enough, the fact that I know this sudden transformation and humble approach to life’s tests WILL be hard… But, know that it’s proven to be rewarding for me… NOW follow me as I allow the Holy Spirit to lead.

Jesus saves!!!

by shootahdcpassion

OUR scares, fears… then ultimate TEARS thrusts OUR heavenly father Ohhhhh so near!!!

Don’t be too deep when pondering on my next statement, because it shouldn’t be taken to heart, in a literal sense so to say… But, do keep in mind that God delights in OUR brokenness… And please allow me to quickly elaborate, because I would NEVER purposely write anything that stirs controversy or confuses any.

Like with OUR earthly parents, when problems arise in OUR lives, and OUR hearts get heavy, it’s human instinct for us to seek out comfort from those seasoned individuals who reared us up and made every attempt to shelter us from ALL heartache that would/could EVER come nigh our dwellings. It’s common for us to either call our parents on the phone or even run to their destination just to get a hug and lay on their shoulders and cry out, in agony, while WE express our discomforts, and like clockwork… they give US the reassurance and encouraging words WE need to make it through.

In the same way, God wants US to run to Him and lay it ALL out for Him, so He can kick into action on OUR behalf. The nurturing nature bestowed upon OUR parents came from God. Therefore, it’s evident that He obviously BETTER knows how to maneuver US through the ups and downs of life that we’ll surely face.

On a day to day basis, WE will have situations that feel like they’re going to break US down to the lowest degree, and I know firsthand that worry and stressing will be OUR initial reaction. But, we MUST train ourselves to beat the clock… start each day fresh… by entering into God’s PRESENCE as soon as you open your eyes… For me, I make EVERY effort to acknowledge Him before my feet hit the ground, and I start out thanking Him for waking me up and for keeping my FAMILY safe as well. Then, I go right into surrender mode… inviting Him in, to control ALL my interactions of the day. To make sure that I don’t offend NO one, and that I don’t overly take offense to anything someone may say or do to me; that would normally cause me to get outta character.

Not to downplay God’s abilities to properly cover us. But, the enemy may find a way to sneak up on, and bring us bad news (death of a love one, life deterring ailment, loss of a job, infidelity in OUR marriages, eviction, and food deprivation) to name a few… I mean the list of tormenting and disheartening events can go on and on. Nevertheless, God is deftly OUR go to in EVERY aspect.

That’s what I was referring to in my earlier statement, about God delighting in OUR brokenness… once these predicaments arise in OUR lives, and we show Him that we’re TOTALLY dependent on Him… believe me, He jumps right on it, in ways unimaginable, and before long you’ll notice that YOUR upset slowly subsides.

Your scares, fears and tears without a shadow of doubt brings God nearer to you, if you take the time to call on Him. Don’t suffer alone… God is forever on the THRONE, waiting to intervene like ONLY He can.

Jesus saves!!!

by shootahdcpassion

Which eyes will I view the world through TODAY

Good question, but it won’t take a rocket scientist to help me figure out the NO brainer answer… Deftly, I choose to allow the Holy Spirit within me to TOTALLY take control and assist me in seeing EVERY aspect of my interactions in the supernatural.

There’s absolutely no way that’ll I’ll give the enemy the chance to corrupt everything I stand for and believe in ANY further… true, he’s doing things that should have me curled up in a fetal position, somewhere contemplating suicide… But, the God I serve won’t allow him the pleasure.

Grant it, I’m human… Soooooo, NO doubt my emotions are running rapid, while I attempt to figure out why the bad is coming down so rambunctious. And it’s simple… the devil knows his time is thin. So, he’s stirring up a world wide mess before he loses his grips altogether. My reason exactly for staying so close to God… face it Fam, we NEED protection out here nowadays, from dangers seen and unseen.

No, I don’t attend church as regular as I’d like to. But, God stretches beyond those four walls… he’s omnipresent (EVERY WHERE) and easy to tap into. I beg of each of you, to please purpose in YOUR life, for you, your friends and your love ones, that you will get in the habit of talking to God daily… before even stepping out of bed if possible. If NOT, maybe while you’re brushing your teeth, taking your shower, preparing breakfast or even driving to work… just enter into His presence, first with thanksgiving in your heart, and praise coming from the depths of your inner being… then, invite Him into your day, to control everything you say, think, eat… the places you go, and the people you come in contact with… this type of surrendering is important, because the enemy is sneaky and has devious plans set before each of us that God can already see with His omniscient capabilities, and He’ll be able to deviate it ALL only after you’ve given Him permission.

God says cast OUR cares on Him, and that’s deftly what we need to do, without worrying that we’ll overload Him with difficulties selfishly… Worry NOT, nuttin you could EVER face can overwhelm God… What we deal with is mediocre to Him. Therefore, follow me as I change the lenses of how I’ll view life and the chaos coupled with it, and choose also to let Jesus obscure the vision of the flesh, and rather help you to see ALL from a FAITH filled – heavenly perspective.

Jesus saves!!!

by shootahdcpassion