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Being stole from, hands tied smh

Hey P-Duds,

I real DID NOT wanna do another video ๐Ÿ“น pertaining to this particular subject so fast, but people dafuq irri and be wit da shitz, boutta make a bitch spazz liiikkkkeee a muthah fuckah.. Why, just why do errybody keep trying dey hand? #nocap I’m truly at my breaking point. I really want yall to listen to dis shit and give your honest opinion… The fuckery is on overload #getdastrap. I don’t mind paying for anything that’s worth my ๐Ÿ’ฐ๐Ÿ’ณ๐Ÿ—ž๏ธ๐Ÿ’ฒ but for you to arbitrarily TAKE from me and think ๐Ÿค” shit sweet ohhhhhh nah PASSION gon nut da fuck up and rightfully so, and I’m sure many of you will agree… Just listen to da specifics smh… I’m absolutely devastated bout how I’m being cold carried #PERIODTT

How do you begin again???

It’s been sooooo long since I’ve dated, and now I don’t have a clue how to even get started anew.

I was thinking about just remaining single, and continue to work, retire and eventually enjoy life… but I’m NO hermit crab, and this day to day loneliness is really getting to me SMH.

Then, I said I’ll start going out again, so that I can attract men. But, nowadays where do you even go, to be sure NOT to end up with the same type of men that’s been in my life grrrrrrrhhhhhhh.

It’s a hard knock life for ME

NOT understanding why is causing my confusion. How WILL I EVER get to sleep at night??? Were ALL those good days fraudulent? If so, you deserve an Oscar!!! How could I EVER be so stupid, NOT to have seen this coming beforehand and readied myself for it all… SMH ggggrrrrrrhhhhhh ๐Ÿ˜ฆ

I haven’t a clue as to why this is taking place the way it is, but I Pray with EVERYTHING in me that God keeps me strong enough NOT to be all suicidal AGAIN… I’m tired of the emotional rollercoaster. I’m sitting at work thinking that it’ll all be good in this or that amount of time, but clearly I really don’t know how long the grieving process will TAKE, especially because I don’t know in the first place why you’re leaving me to start.

I’m feeling that it can’t be another female because I check your phone and it’s ALWAYS empty of calls and texts, but you may have mastered a way to keep it all hidden from me, if that is the case, just know karma is REAL.

I further keep feeling like my healing will take long because I have no friends or family near me to keep my mind off you and depression is adamant in that case. I was gon get on a dating site, just to keep myself busy and in an effort to ward off being somber, but that’s just a temporary fix that I don’t wanna be bothered with… Geeeesssssshhhhh life’s a bi+ยขฯ€ then you die!!!

Prayers Plllleeeeeaaaaassssseeee

First day back… There’s a purpose for my homelessness, and God will get the Glory for my deliverance from it ALL!!!

 

I have the slightest idea why ALL of this is playing out the way it is. But, I’m determined to continue on with my Vloggling and blogging because I earnestly and honestly believe that God wants me to show my current bad predicament, and how He’s daily bringing me through and out on the other side.

One thing for sure though, and two things for certain… Once you’ve hit rock bottom, there’s Nooooooo place else to go except UPWARDS, and that’s definitely in the making for me and for anyone else who’s experiencing the turmoil I am… Keep your Faith and remain encouraged… God won’t leave US nor forsake US.

Reaching, surpassing one’s limitations.

I hurt that you’re hurting and I empathize with everything you’re experiencing and wish I were close enough to you to just grab you and hug you for hours, then sit with you all day, and just talk things through, until you feel better. I’ve been where you are and I can attest to the fact that Prayer definitely changes things, it did for me. It didn’t happen overnight, in fact I suffered intermittently for fourteen long Yyyyyyeeeeeaaaaaarrrrrrrssssss, but that was all my fault. I surely could’ve been done with the craziness I went through faster, had I remained steadfast and avoided my triggers, but Nooooooo, I actually pursued the conduits even the more SMH, and by doing so I prolonged my own demise.

Even though I don’t know you personally, please accept me saying that I do love you like family, and want only what’s best for you moving forward. Without knowing the full magnitude of all that’s bothering you, it’s hard to try and assist. I don’t claim one bit to be a know it all or a professional with a focal point of stress or depression, but rather I’m coming from a place of experience, which has been considered to be our BEST teacher.

The best I can do, with miles in between us, being our hugest barrier is to offer up Prayer for you, if you like. I won’t assume that you’ll be receptive. Therefore, I’ll wait for your reply, I’m even willing to give you my number, in case you just wanna talk or you’d prefer Prayer via landline. Of course, I’m interceding for you as I type. But, I’d like to be more interpersonal and actually touch and agree with you… Plllleeeeeaaaaassssseeee respond, and Prayerfully I’m not out of line in my approach, your story just captivated me is all… Waiting patiently!!!

Alone No More is here for you; Heavenly sent… Be Blessed my friend

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