NOT understanding why is causing my confusion. How WILL I EVER get to sleep at night??? Were ALL those good days fraudulent? If so, you deserve an Oscar!!! How could I EVER be so stupid, NOT to have seen this coming beforehand and readied myself for it all… SMH ggggrrrrrrhhhhhh 😦

I haven’t a clue as to why this is taking place the way it is, but I Pray with EVERYTHING in me that God keeps me strong enough NOT to be all suicidal AGAIN… I’m tired of the emotional rollercoaster. I’m sitting at work thinking that it’ll all be good in this or that amount of time, but clearly I really don’t know how long the grieving process will TAKE, especially because I don’t know in the first place why you’re leaving me to start.

I’m feeling that it can’t be another female because I check your phone and it’s ALWAYS empty of calls and texts, but you may have mastered a way to keep it all hidden from me, if that is the case, just know karma is REAL.

I further keep feeling like my healing will take long because I have no friends or family near me to keep my mind off you and depression is adamant in that case. I was gon get on a dating site, just to keep myself busy and in an effort to ward off being somber, but that’s just a temporary fix that I don’t wanna be bothered with… Geeeesssssshhhhh life’s a bi+¢π then you die!!!

Prayers Plllleeeeeaaaaassssseeee