148 Days… Nothing beats a failure but a TRY 😍💯🥰💋😘

Today has been very productive, and I gotta thank all who’ve been Praying for and with me for almost a week now, since I began this unwarranted countdown, and most certainly I thank You Daddy, for hearing our Prayers, and slowly but surely bringing me out of the sunken place, that had me bound… Yes, I can refer to it in the past tense, because I’m believing God for a total miraculous breakthrough, to the point where, even the lingering ideation disappears for good!!! I claim it, believe it, and so SHALL receive it.

All the good things that happen for me today, reassures me, that there’s definitely POWER in Prayer; especially Prayer in numbers. I started to have some cigarette withdrawal jitters earlier, and was about to give in to the cravings, and rush out to buy a fresh pack, but God said… Ohhhhh no you won’t, and He reminded me of my nicotine transdermal patches, that were just stored up for this type of emergency 🤩 #ThankYou Jesus, You’re the BEST 🥰… I did awesome in my workout sessions for today, I noticed that I was able to push myself further than before #Hallelujah 💖… Pandora was on fire 🔥🔥🔥 earlier, once Bacc Seat came on, my lil legs was getting it lol 😂… I had to slow myself down, so I wouldn’t gas out so fast 😵‍💫😩🤪

I stopped for a while, and baked myself some fish, covered in sautéed onions, butter and lemon juice 👌, with some sweet corn on the side, and some good ole kool-aid, then I was back to the races… I started with Body, thank God it’s slow paced, cause I was stuffed and sluggish… So, I took my time in the beginning, but before I knew it Ballin came on, and once again my legs was going so fast, I most certainly could’ve beat the greatest marathon runner of all times lol 😂 lls 🤣… I’m just so ecstatic that my mood has improved significantly… God knows how grateful I am to each of you, who have supported me; some of you, for many many years, have been here since I created this site, and was going through all types of turmoil, you never left me, and always sent me great words of encouragement, and I appreciate it, really I do 😘

Today, when I realized how happy I was, of course I thanked God, for even giving me the presence of mind, to get back on my site and reach out for help. Just imagine, had I missed Him leading and guiding me, I wouldn’t be moving in the right direction, towards healing, and just may have gotten so frustrated, that I could have acted on my suicidal thoughts sooner than I planned smh 🤦🏽‍♀️… But, God makes nooooo mistakes 😜… Also, while pondering on my blissful feelings, I thought about my future, and the things that I need to began to work towards, in order for me to have a long lasting span of happiness, and I remembered my Pastor always said that we should Pray specifically, not merely trivial. So, I mustered up the courage, to ask God for a handsome, God fearing, intelligent man, who don’t cheat, don’t hit women, loves to travel, loves children (I have 14 grandchildren and 1 great grand), loving my babies just like I do is a MUST 🥰… I’m retired, but I want to be either a radio personality, social media influencer or start a record label, music is my life, not to mention all the talent in my family. But, I want my mate to be like minded, and desire one or all of the things I’m interested in, not to be selfish, as if everything has to revolve around me and my wants… Absolutely not!!! Just compatible and able to work together on our endeavors as a team. “Team work makes the dream work”

Welp, it’s time to relax and this is when I get bored and the racing thoughts began to drive me nuts grrrhhhh 😩… I’m scared to make and take my famous OTC cocktail, after it gave me the night terrors, that I experienced the other night shewww lawd… That was scccaaarrryyy 👀👀👀. But, I honestly think until I find an online support group, I’ll have to keep self medicating, in an effort to rid myself of mental torment. BTW, if any of you know of a site, that posts about good movies, please fly me in… “Put me in the game coach” lol 😂… As always, I love you guys to the moon and back and once again thank you so freekin much ttyl 💣💖🤩

#PaulettePassionWilliams #PauletteWilliams #shootahdcpassion #CertifiedSTEPPAH #putemonnashirt4Passion #pluckemoff4passion #pressemout4passion