It’s a hard knock life for ME

NOT understanding why is causing my confusion. How WILL I EVER get to sleep at night??? Were ALL those good days fraudulent? If so, you deserve an Oscar!!! How could I EVER be so stupid, NOT to have seen this coming beforehand and readied myself for it all… SMH ggggrrrrrrhhhhhh 😦

I haven’t a clue as to why this is taking place the way it is, but I Pray with EVERYTHING in me that God keeps me strong enough NOT to be all suicidal AGAIN… I’m tired of the emotional rollercoaster. I’m sitting at work thinking that it’ll all be good in this or that amount of time, but clearly I really don’t know how long the grieving process will TAKE, especially because I don’t know in the first place why you’re leaving me to start.

I’m feeling that it can’t be another female because I check your phone and it’s ALWAYS empty of calls and texts, but you may have mastered a way to keep it all hidden from me, if that is the case, just know karma is REAL.

I further keep feeling like my healing will take long because I have no friends or family near me to keep my mind off you and depression is adamant in that case. I was gon get on a dating site, just to keep myself busy and in an effort to ward off being somber, but that’s just a temporary fix that I don’t wanna be bothered with… Geeeesssssshhhhh life’s a bi+¢π then you die!!!

Prayers Plllleeeeeaaaaassssseeee

14 thoughts on “It’s a hard knock life for ME

  1. Hey sis!!! OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO do I know what you are going through, and as one sister has said GOD will move people out our way to get us to his plan desination for us. With that being said know this sometimes we make things that are seasonal lifetime, and because we do that we invest all that we have in it. We find ourselves trying to secure our place in that situation when we weren’t suppose to be long in the first place. Know that when you tell GOD yes there will pruning taking place in order for you to grow. Though this moment might be hurtful, know that pruning is just a sign of greater. Girl this was just a growing moment for you and him too. Don’t look at it like you were a fool and miss it, look at it as though you learn a lesson to listen more closely to daddy than your feelings. Easier said than done I know, but it can be done. Praying for you and remember you got a support system waiting to love on you for time like these and more.

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  2. Hello my sister in Christ,
    I am sending prayers your way but know this if something/someone is being removed from your life, know your Father is bringing greater. I have filled your very shoes and although it was hard to let go the blessings afterwards have been tremendous. I can’t even thank God enough for removing the parasite in my life. I was busy hold onto a dollar when God was trying to give me more. I know hurt and know it well but I am here to tell you that the Father we have will provide. I love you but HE loves you more. Keep your head up and chest out because changes come to make us better daughters of the King.

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